Woes of Change

Being on my new diet is difficult. I have somewhat limited options on what I can eat and I am pretty much having to relearn how to cook for my new diet. My diet is low fat, low carbohydrate, and low sugar. My Master was on the Adkins diet several years ago, but he could have fatty foods which more or less made up favor wise for the lack of carbohydrates. Many of the recipes I had for that diet won’t work because they are high in fat and lack a decent vegetable/ fruit element.

I have been experimenting a lot in the kitchen and I have been faced with mostly failures. I feel like I did when I was in junior high and starting to experiment in the kitchen. Failure after failure, it literally took me years to get a decent grasp on cooking. (My parents were the boxed meal people and we had no spices in my house when I was growing up. So learning how to cook did take a great deal of perseverance on my part.)I did come up with a chili, stuffed broccoli, and whole wheat dough recipe that aren’t half bad. But they are still in the tweaking stages.

This whole thing is making me very depressed. It sucks whenever we go out to eat and there are one or two things on the entire menu that I can actually eat and at some places there is nothing. Then the wait staff will always ask if we want an appetizer. I tell them there is nothing on their appetizer menu I can eat. Then they tell me their chips and spinach dip is good. I am sure their chips and spinach dip is good, but that doesn’t change the fact that I can’t eat it.

Tonight because I lost some of myself moderation, I had one piece of sugar free candy, a Clementine, and a serving of wheat thins. I realize this does not sound like binge eating to a normal person, but it spiked my blood sugar up over 200. Since my doctor believes I can control this with diet, which is true I can if I don’t do crap like I did tonight. I don’t have anything to get my blood sugar down, other than waiting and hoping it goes down. It did eventually go down.

I suppose this is just one of life’s challenges that I have to face. Unfortunately, I don’t think I am doing a very good job of facing it.

-emma